Skip to main content

Fortune Cookie Jesus OR God is my butler and bellman




I love my job, especially working for a “Christian” company. My favorite part of the day is when the mass emails intended to inspire, to lift office moral, and to make you just feel good pop in unexpectedly to my little outlook box! This one came forwarded to me from a co-worker. I couldn’t really tell if this was taken from The Flying Eggroll’s fortune cookies or if Joel Osteen coined the thought… but, realistically either is a likely explanation.

Here’s what it said:

When God leads you to the edge of the cliff, trust Him fully and let go, only 1 of 2 things will happen, either He'll catch you when you fall, or He'll teach you how to fly! The power of one sentence! God is going to shift things around for you today and let things work in your favor. God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close.” (emphasis mine)

Nonetheless, I am reminded every day of the superstitious nature of the average person’s folk-theology.

I don’t know the religious history of the people passing this stuff around, but my co-worker and fellow-minded friend in the faith responded by saying this:

“…too bad many would say that God didn’t catch them…instead he let them fall on their f-ing faces…I have friends who are indeed Christian, yet have been through very difficult times…this kind of crap is despicable to them.

I love the inconsistencies of company policies. We should find some blessing or encouraging promise from the Koran or the Book of Mormon and send it out.”

Popular posts from this blog

These are lines from Goethe's Faust : (A young moldable student approached Dr. Faust to learn to speak well) Wagner: Forgive me, But I thought you were declaiming. Been reciting some Greek tragedy, no doubt; I wish to improve myself in this same art; 'Tis a most useful one. I've heard it said, An actor might give lessons to a priest. Faust: Yes! when your priest's an actor, as may happen. Wagner: Oh! if a man shuts himself up forever in his dull study; if one sees the world never, unless on some chance holyday, looks at it from a distance, through a telescope, how can we learn to sway the minds of men by eloquence? to rule them, or persuade? Faust: If feeling does not prompt, in vain you strive, If from the soul the language does not come, but its own impulse, to impel the hearts of hearers, with communicated power, in vain you strive -- in vain you study earnestly. Toil on forever; piece together fragments; Cook up your broken scraps of sentences, and blow, with ...

The Intolerance of Presbyterian Creeds

The bind between American political allegiance and Protestant evangelical conservatism is a key which unlocks the door of much early American civil history especially during the antebellum era through the early 20th century. To be conservative and American meant that you must regard a Protestant form of Christianity, namely the revivalistic, moral gospel which declared a morally conservative view of the socio-political system as king. In fact, not to be Protestant and politically conservative was in line with defaming the stars and stripes. Hart describes a situation in the early 20th century where the state of Utah elected and appointed a Mormon Apostle, Reed Smoot, to the U.S. Senate. Smoot underwent serious investigation from a Senate appointed committee to deliberate upon the ability of a Mormon to function in the place of a Senator given his religious views. The conservative Protestant ethos of the age was skeptical of any other religious conviction in its ability to be “American”...

8/15/2016

  Kevin,                                                               At this time I believe it is necessary that I inform you of what is going on internally. As a high school boys soccer coach I learned that you want team captains who are fully dedicated to the team’s success. If they aren’t, the entire team struggles to reach its goals.  While I am part of the FBBC team, I believe I am lacking in this desired leadership quality myself.  After seven full months in my current position, I do not believe my passions are managing money for the church. As a result I do not have internal peace about the longevity of my current position. I believe there are better people for this role. I believe FBBC would be a stronger organization if a person more suited for this role were here. I c...